Thursday, August 30, 2012

Hangin' out on cloud 9...

As I sit here, I am looking at the computer screen with welled up eyes.  So much so, it's hard for me to see the computer screen.  It's difficult to even try to explain the day that Steven and I had yesterday, meeting the intended father for the child I will carry as a surrogate.
When I started thinking about surrogacy, I often would daydream about the parents I would carry for.  All types of people would cross my mind & so many thoughts would consume my imagination.  But, never did I think we could find someone so absolutely perfect for us, as we did yesterday.

We arrived to the agency in Wisconsin around 1pm and as soon as we walked in, the receptionist let us know that the dad and the 2 coordinators had went to lunch and would be back shortly.  Oh man, the nerves set in!  I sat there anxiously awaiting the car to pull up.  So much so, the receptionist said "You are nervous, aren't you???"  I said "YES!  Very!!" It's a moment I had dreamed up to be so right that I was afraid it could go wrong.
The ladies walked in first and of course we exchanged big hugs since it had been 6 months since we have seen them.  And, then I walked over and introduced myself & Steven and gave a big hugs to the intended dad.  <--- who from now on we will just call "Frank"  to make it simpler.
Over the next 2 hours the 5 of us just talked and talked about what is to come.  Frank explained to us why is he reaching out to surrogacy & how all he wants in this lifetime is to become a father.  At points in the conversation I just looked to Steven and was like "Wow, could he be more perfect for us?"  We both agreed that he reminds us of two of my best guy friends mixed into one person.  Which of course, describes what a great match he is for us.
We got all of the necessary questions answered and we decided to head back to Iowa and Frank would follow us.
After he checked into his hotel, we brought him to see our house, meet my parents and meet our boys.  We had a great chat with him and my parents (with all the 3 year old crazy boy chaos going on in the background).  It was at this point in the conversation that Frank mentioned he is very active with charity work.  I basically wanted to do a double take... "I'm sorry... you're what?!"  For anyone who knows me, knows I am a huge advocate for the March of Dimes, as well as several other non-profit organizations and charities.  I looked over to Steven and I said "I just can't believe it.  He is such a great fit"
After about an hour of meeting with my family, the 3 of us decided to head to one of the restaurants in town here so we could really get to know each other.  IT.WENT.FABULOUS.
We didn't stop talking for the entire 2 hours we were there.  We talked about our pasts, our siblings, our parents, traveling, children, relationships and of course, this baby who will make their appearance next year.  We talked about how communication will work over the course of the year and how often we can chat.  I let him know that I am very willing to chat everyday by email or phone.  I can't imagine how hard it will be for him to be 1,000's of miles away from his growing baby & not know what is going on.  He said to me "please tell me how you are feeling.  If you feel great, tell me.  If you are going to throw up, tell me.  I want to know the good and the bad, too."

I remember sitting at the dinner table, across from Frank and just soaking it all in.  I held back tears and thought to myself "This is why I am doing this."  Adoption isn't an option for a single man and this is his only option to have a child.  We can help him do that.  We can help his dream come true.

 Everything felt so natural with the 3 of us and I know that is what is most important in this journey.

Well, I think that is all for now.  We are going to pick up Frank from his hotel and take him to see our restaurant and my studio!  Thanks again for your support!


Saturday, August 11, 2012

Meet the Parent! :)

So we finally have a date set to meet the intended dad that I will be a gestational surrogate for!  The BIG DAY is set for Aug 29 and we will meet at the agency in Wisconsin!
If all goes well, the dad plans to come back to CR to meet my family/friends and to see the community and my workplace.  Steven and I are both so excited that this process has started moving along and we can't wait to finally meet the ID.
We also know that the ID is completely supportive of me blogging this journey.  He knows that this will be a good outlet for me, all the while, promoting positive and ethical surrogacy ideas.  That made me extremely happy.  As of right now, his identity will stay private and I don't plan on posting photos or his name, unless he gives me the Ok to do so.  But, I will be sure to share anything and everything you may or may not want to know! ha!  :)

Also, the agency gals have said that this will most likely move pretty quickly after our first meeting with a tentative TRANSFER in October!  Yikes, I might be pregnant in just a few short months!  :)

So, the countdown begins... we are meeting in less than 18 days!  WOOOHOOOO!  I can't wait to post after we meet.